Random
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2000
Popular
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     Recent
Anonymous Anonymous · 15h

Life As A 21 Year-Old:

Me: Hey, liver, I'm going to a party tonight.

Liver: AGAIN?!?

Me: Huh?

Liver: THIS IS THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK! WHENEVER YOU GO TO THESE PARTIES YOU ALWAYS DECIDE TO DRINK LIKE TEN SHOTS!

Me: ...Yeah, but you can fight the to–

Liver: DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH WORK IT IS TO DO THIS CR*P EVERY SINGLE WEEK?

Me: ......N–

Liver: IT'S LIKE BEING A HEART SURGEON!

Me: How do you know anything about heart surgery if you're a liver?

Liver: HUH? OL' HEART HAD TO HAVE STUFF BE DONE JUST SIX MONTHS AGO, AND I WAS THERE TO SEE IT ALL!

Heart: I'm dead inside...

Me: Oh, yeah, maybe eating those twelve cheeseburgers at once wasn't the best idea...

Liver: YEAH! SO, MY POINT IS, DON'T GO TO YOUR STUPID PARTY!

Me: What? Come on!

Brain: You heard him, Anonymous.

Me: What?

Brain: Yeah, I agree with liver. Do you know how many neurons I have to produce just to get liver to do all this? It's exhausting!

Me: Oh yeah? Well, TELL ME, brain, who is the one telling me to go to these parties, HUH?

Brain: Well...uh...it's not my fault! That stupid dopamine is always hacking my system!

Me: OH, JEEZ, HUH?

Brain: Anonymous...do you know how much work it is to have to control all these organs and all the external activities that you perform?

Me: ...Yes?

Brain: Well, it's impossible to not make a few screw-ups along the way!

Me: OH, JEEZ!

Bladder: Just don't...please...

Me: BLADDER? NOW YOU'RE JOINING IN ON THIS?

Bladder: It's easy to excrete water and urea, but with all the alcohol you consume, it's really painful! It burns like crazy!

Me: WHO CARES ABOUT YOU?!?!

Bladder: *Triggered*

Me: ...Bladder, what's wrong?

Bladder: Ever since you were a fetus, I have been underestimated. Nobody cared about me. The other organs bullied me because all I did was store and excrete urine.

Me: Oh...I'm so sorry...

Meanwhile, further away...

Random Guy: Who is that guy talking to over there?

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A made-up conversation with my brain:

Me: Hey Brain, did I have any homework?
Brain: Sonic Adventure 2 was released in 2001.
Me: Yeah, but do I have homework?
Brain: Hey, want to watch some Youtube?
Me: I'll take that as a no.

(Next day)
Teacher: Now, take out the homework you did yesterday.
Me: Crap.

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Congratulations Kyriome on beating my challenge!!! keep up the good work and stuff :D*also wishes my shout outs were better*

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Congratulations Thaphoe On beating my challenge :DDD, I cant believe you made it*wishes there was a better way to make this shoutout better Xd*

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Anonymous Anonymous · 19h

Throughout the day, there has been a voice in my head saying,

"Dusty's IQ is 109."

I don't know why, but it's just saying that.

P.S. I don't have schizophrenia.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hakxecE9i6E

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the ting goes
skrrrrrrrrrrrrrah
pap pap kak kak kak
skibidipap pap
and a
pupubrrrrrrrrrrdoom
skya
du du
kun kun
boom boom

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CONGRATULATIONS to WhoAreYou for completing my challenge :D, Good Job!!!

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Why am i the guy known for bad grammar??? ill make some confessions about my grammar, i think i am REALLY good at spelling, umm maybe average to above average on the commas and junk, im more used to "Much" than "Many" when it should be many its a bad habit i dont think when i do something like that tho, and i dont try to use my grammar really well, i mean i could but im just really lazy :P

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These are some theories if u want to watch them ;)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WMSQNVhMqA&t=15s(part 1)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jcxW_ciP5R4(part 2)

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Dusty Dusty · 2d · Edited

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9F2djsuZuTg

HAIL LUIGI. HE CAN DO ANYTHING BY DOING NOTHING!

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Anonymous Anonymous · 2d

You aren't afraid of things on COBS?

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Anonymous Anonymous · 2d

Imagine in a world of cobs, you get bitten by a whole cob of black widows. (Yeah, black widows on the cob)

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Anonymous Anonymous · 2d

Wine Alcoholics Celebrate Independence Day Too:

They drink red, drink white, and turn blue!

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CrystalMajestica CrystalMajestica · 2d · Edited

Today during school, this female student said, "I don't like it when people disrespect women! It makes me angry!"

Me in my head: Well, I don't like it when people disrespect people regardless of gender...

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Kyriome Kyriome · 2d

The Smell of Rain
An original song by Kyriome

When you're feeling kinda down
with nowhere to go
and looking down to the ground,
look up high, not down low!

When lot's of things go wrong
and you're in a lot of pain,
it doesn't matter if it's physical or emotional!
Just enjoy the smell of rain!

If you follow my advice,
then to you, no one will lie
cause' I'm giving you the truth
that your friend is in the sky!

Smell of rain, smell of rain,
it won't cause any pain!
Smell of rain, smell of rain,
it's the best thing you could gain!

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Is this the best place to get posts?

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。*゚+.*.。(っ ͡° ل͜ ͡°)っ✂╰⋃╯

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Anonymous Anonymous · 3d

Okay, it's Anony again, and I am ready to start classifying! Let's begin!

Alright, let's start with our user who uses the site most often. That is: FluffyTorpedo. Now, his traits are: poor grammar, likes to make jokes that are part of a bigger trait or joke (such as anime) in his posts. Now, there are a few others who share this trait: Dexzernq79, SaladDressing, and NapsterGastly (somewhat). I will call this Cat Ingrammaricus because "in" is Latin for "not", and the base word is grammar. Now, there is a Subcat in this Cat as well. Dexzernq79 and NapsterGastly like to joke and talk about anime a lot, but FluffyTorpedo and SaladDressing don't do it as much. I will call those two Animeicus, because the base is anime. Now, FluffyTorpedo and SaladDressing like to make jokes surrounding the environment around them (such as someone making a post). So, I will call their Subcat Contributa, because the base is the word contribute.

Now, I will move on to our next group. Since we were talking about anime before, let's move on to a video game few people know about: Bayonetta. Now, CrystalMajestica likes this game, of course, but she also has some other traits, which I will make another Cat of. Some of her traits include: fair grammar, Bayonetta loving, sympathy. _Saraphina_ shares a few of these traits. She has fair grammar, and intelligence. She also likes to make corrections, along with Dusty. So, these three's Cat will be called Intellectua, because they all have intellect. When I said three members, I was lying. InvincibleForever also has a few of these traits. Now, _Saraphina_ and Dusty both like to make corrections, so they will be one Subcat: Correcticus, because they correct. However, CrystalMajestica and InvincibleForever both talk about experiences they are having, being a family condition or mosquitoes (with good grammar), so they get a Subcat: Vloggeria. Now, I haven't named the Cat yet, so it will be: Programmaricus.

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Anonymous Anonymous · 3d

Hey, peeps-a-ma-leepidee-deepidees! Because there is an 81% chance you don't know who I am already, I am Anony! So, in the last couple days, I had this weird idea to classify each user on this site like you classify organisms. I have been having this recent interest in biology, so that probably explains it. Now, I have decided that this is actually a good idea, so I will do it. Here's:

Note: If you are a dead user on this site, I will NOT use you in this classification! Okay, now, let's begin!

Now, this is what I'm thinking for the classification. I have a domain as the first, which is, what main being you are following is (obviously, you all are Calbel). But, if you were following Cowbelly, that would be different. So, for everyone, your domain will be called Calbellian. The next will be Category (Cat for short). That basically sums up your traits on the site (i.e. if you were a memer, you would be in a category with the other memers on this site). The next will be the Subcat. Basically, if you or some other people in your category had a slightly alternative trait, you will belong in a different Subcat (i.e. if you only liked to use dead memes in your posts as opposed to modern memes, you and maybe a few others who do the same will be placed in a Subcat inside your Cat). The final level would be the Individual (or Indiv for short). That is, of course, who you as an individual are (i.e. if your username was HarambeOurSaviour666, that would be your Indiv). Now, I am running out of room to start classifying you, so I will do that in the next post I make. Buh bye!

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